i think this is the only place that i feel safe about writing about him.
i am falling for him at an alarming rate.
i am not quite sure what to do about this.
i am not sure why i am doing this.
i am beginning to wonder if i am this desperate.
i know the answer is yes; yes i am this desperate.
i am falling for a man who used to dance with an orange chair during school dances.
i know he sounds insane, but he's actually quite brilliant.
i know, though, that he will never be with me.
i know that we are too different.
i know it will not work.
i am aware of the fact that this is what he does; flirts aimlessly with women.
i am, unfortunately, prone to this sort of behavior.
i unfortunately, flirt back.
i encourage it.
i am asking myself what is wrong with me?
i wonder if i'll ever be able to survive another heartbreak.
i know i will, but at the moment i do not feel strong enough.
i know that he is not interested in me, or a relationship.
i love him because he is brilliant, a writer, poetic, and can make me laugh.
i need help.
i need to not like him.
i seem to be unable to stop myself.
i need help.